The Middlest Child is a webpage of friends.

We strive to amuse and occasionally offend.

Behold our contributors!

(Some or all of the below facts may be fictionalized)

Kari G./Kari@themiddlestchild.com

Quick Bio: This is Kari. She will fuck .Your shit. Up. Kari hails from Portland, Oregon-but now communicates via London, England making this here website international-what! She is co-writer and artist of The Fetus Adventures and general contributor to awesomeness. She once killed a man in a staring contest. She is a Junior attending Chapman University, so she is basically still warmed by the placenta of college security and has yet to face the cold harsh post womb real world. She

Nickname: Fetus, Blasta, Feet, Karizi

Interests: Photobooth on her Mac, Comic heroes that serve Icy Cold Justice with their umbilical cord, Beating ass at Scene-It, Kickin’ straight old school, Watchin’ Almost Famous, Freestyle rap contests, Writing, and trying to be as much like Snoop Dogg as possible.

Middlest Child Contributions: Fetus Adventures (Co-Writer/Artist), and Miscellany thoughts.

Graham T./Graham@themiddlestchild.com

Quick Bio: Hello future sex bots! Welcome to the world of Graham Travis Towers. His name is a sentence and his forehead is bleeding. Look at this fancy chiaroscuro lighting. He is so artsy. Actually he is one of three members of the band the Artsy Phucks, debut album “Fuck your Army,” coming to soon. Unlike Kari, G.T.T. is not protected by the structure of a University system, having just graduated from Chapman University with a degree in Screenwriting and Music. Don’t look directly into his eyes or you may have an instant heart attack based of the sheer absolute adorableness of him. Ladies and Gentleman eat your heart out. He will do a thing, holmes.

Nicknames: G.T.T, Sex Bot, G-Unit, Doggy, Thomas Pynchon

Interests: Justin Timberlake (aka Pure Sex), Prince, 3-Way’s with J.T. and Prince, the lyrics of Ice-T and Snoop Dogg, The inner hierarchy of the Wu-Tang Clan

Middlest Child Contributions: Miscellany randoms

Dres F.C./Dres@themiddlestchild.com

Quick Bio: Dres (Pronounced “Drace”) is from the best city in the midwest, best city in the whole wide wide world (Thanks Lupe). Born and raised in the state that the brings us all the Brewers, Packers, and Bucks he strives to be the biggest and best fantasy sports player internet geeks have ever seen, despite his long record of losing in every fantasy sport created. A big middle finger to Streak For the Cash on The Worldwide Leader. Dres is known to his friends as a prideful Germa-Rican who will never turn down a competition. A recent grad from Chapman film production, Dres hopes to someday achieve a job that will allow him to do what he really wants- write . Despite this desire to become a writer and be paid handsomely for it, Dres hasn’t read an entire book without pictures since high-school.

Nicknames: D-res, Amadaus, D*, Dresicle, Dresy-Dres, Mysterio, Gumby

Interests: Fantasy sports, soccer, brewers, packers, Bret Favre, watching Almost Famous, MLB video games, authentic puerto-rican margaritas, expensive tequila, cheap wine, writing

Middlest Child Contributions: The Fetus Adventures (Co-Writer), Time Fisters! (Co-Author), Genius Miscellany writings

Ben D./Ben@themiddlestchild.com

Quick Bio: Not enough leg in anyones opinion, because you know what? Benjamin Nicklin Deeb likes to leave something to the imagination. Ben is a genius, and may be a future serial killer but one thing’s for sure, he would only get caught if he wanted to. He continues his studies at Chapman U (See a pattern?) where he triple majors in Philosophy, Political Science, and Trail-Mix Studies. His minors include Environmental Science and Honors. On paper Ben is the most pretentious kid alive. In real life, he’s the third most pretentious kid alive. He, like Dres, belongs to the ever exclusive White Moms Minority Dads club. Ben is probably the least active out of the main contributors.(Take back, this is actually Graham) In fact, it may be only a matter of time before he is taken off the page entirely.

Nicknames: The Lebanon, Benjaminx, Deeb-sies, Deeb

Interests: Risk, Pranking folks, two buck chuck, reading (fancy books without pictures), photoshopping useless shit, immortality, dickin’ yo’ dragon

Middlest Child Contributions: Occasional Musings

Anonymous/Strictly Analog sorry.

Quick Bio: Unknown

Nicknames: Anon, Nonny

Interests: Drinking, General Debauchery

Middlest Child Contributions: Moments in Inebriation

More to come in the future, where dragons rule.

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